1. JohnB

    Fortunately, I never had an abusive parent so I can’t 100% relate to people who have gone through hell in their own home. I can only imagine how it is like to be abused or even raped by your own parent. The art of forgiveness in that regard is something only a few individuals possess in my opinion and most of them will hate their parents forever, sadly. I strongly believe that the Choice of Forgiveness will help them shape their mind in order to give their parents but I am not sure how big the rate of success is. It is a truly heartbreaking concept and an experience you never forget for the rest of your life.

    • Dave

      Hey John, 

      Thanks for stopping by and contributing on this topic. 🙂

      You can’t imagine the kind of pain people who have been abused by their parents go through. I truly feel your concern.

      The best perspective I can actually give you of an abused person is, knowing you have 1 or 2 main people in your life, who you should put all your trust in but then they make you lose their trust by the things they constantly do. It makes you doubt if these are your biological parents or not.

      But then forgiveness should be highly considered by someone who wishes to live a fulfilled life without conflicts. All of us go through hardships but what we chose to do with them is all that matters. Will we choose to carry the pain with us throughout our lifetime and be weighed down by it or we will choose the lessons learnt instead?

      I know it is a really hard thing but then, for our happiness’ sake, we have to choose the forgiveness route.

      And the choice of forgiveness is the best way to learn, practice and perfect the art of true forgiveness.

      Cheers mate. 🙂

  2. Ernest

    Despite what people may say, every parent has done things to their children that they probably regret as well.

    As you point to in your article, resentment is never good for anyone. I’ve heard it said that it is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die.

    We can’t live our lives in the present if we are always looking in the rear view mirror. Thanks for the post.

    • Dave

      You are right Enerst.

      Parents do regret some of their actions. And even though they won’t tell us, you can feel their regret in the way they speak when they are old or through their actions. 

      But as children, we ought to know that parents are also human beings with all the feelings, and weaknesses we know of, so they are bound to make mistakes every so often.

      The other thing is, we need to look forward and make a choice to treat our children better than our parents did to us instead of crying over the pain they put us through as kids. This way we are able to make the world less abusive and a much better place for the next generations to come.

      It’s been a pleasure to have you here. 🙂

  3. jCamden

    You’re right in that your parents are often all you have and the best thing for everyone is to forgive them.
    Another reason to forgive them is you deserve a life without that burden on your shoulders.
    Having to carry around that hurt and pain is so difficult and it makes it almost impossible to function sometimes. What has happened in the past, shouldn’t hold you back from a better future. It’s not easy to forgive but the freedom of having that weight on your shoulders is something everyone who’s been abused deserves!

    • Dave

      You are right JCamden, 

      People should not live lives weighed down by the burden that were put in them decades ago. The abuse may be very painful for them, but folks should know we have a very short time to live. And living this limited time with a heavy heart is not good for the person.

      There’s more goodness and joy waiting in the future and we should strive to meet it with a truthful smile of a free person.

      We should all forgive, forget and live life to fullest. We must do this if we want to live a fulfilled life. 

      Thanksfor stoppping by. 🙂

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