Anxiety is more than just feeling stressed or worried. While stress and anxious feelings are a common response to a situation where we feel under pressure, they usually pass once the stressful situation has passed, or ‘
stressor’ is removed.
Have you been dealing with anxiety?Then the book “Hardcore self help book”,will help you with that.
In this review, i will take you through what the book is ,what it talks about,its cost and finally my thoughts about the book.
I will try all my best to give you every single detail about this book and if by any chance i do not tackle one of the things you really wanted,you can as well ask in the comments area and i will be happy to help you out .
Lets then,get started on this book’s review:
Name : Hardcore Self Help: F**k Anxiety
Author: Robert Duff
Genre: Self-help book
Publisher: CreateSpace Independent Publishing Platform
Publication Date : July 7, 2015
Book length: 74
What It Is
This is a book that teaches you about anxiety and how to find the weapons within yourself to slay it for good.
There is lots of swearing and humor and also loads of helpful and actionable information for you as a reader.
This booked doesn’t go in deep technical or much psychology. That’s why it’s more of an enjoyable read and gives the anxious reader less to worry about and hope that they will manage their anxiety disorder.
Robert gets to the point and doesn’t drag on like most books. His words of wisdom make you feel clear headed and confident in a time that is tough on your life.
Robert has some real-life experience and knowledge in dealing with anxiety and shares some of these experiences which makes it easy to relate too.
Doctor Robert has a doctorate in clinical psychology, he is a husband to a beautiful wife, and a father.
What The Book Talks About
This negative self-talk is something you probably aren’t even aware of, but it eats away at you bit by bit and erodes that self-confidence you need to tackle your anxiety.
You need to set yourself up for success, too. You need to invest in yourself. You need to stop being a butthead and sabotaging yourself.
When you have unhelpful thinking that makes you feel crappy or act in ways that are not in line with your typical self, we refer to these thoughts as maladaptive cognitions or cognitive distortions. It’s a fancy way of describing thoughts that sabotage you. Like I said at the start, sometimes your brain is an asshole.
Panic attack, which is basically when you have intense fear plus a few of those symptoms, and it pops up all of the sudden and prevents you from functioning normally. Panic attacks and physical anxiety symptoms in general are scary as hell.
People don’t die from panic attacks. It just doesn’t happen. You’re body is a dick, but it’s not going to let you self-destruct like that. Even though the emotional pain and physical discomfort may be quite unbearable, anxiety will not physically hurt you.
One way you can be nicer to yourself is by replacing some of that asshole language that you use toward yourself in your head.
The author says,”What if I told you that taking breaks and doing nice things for yourself was not a waste of time? What if I said that they were not counterproductive but actually one of the most productive uses of your time?
Whether your spirit weapon is a badass ninja katana or a freakin’ rocket launcher, the author will help you wield its epic power and slay that little shit named anxiety for good.
In the book he says, “I’m going to be talking to you like a normal person. That means that I will be swearing a lot and making up stupid analogies that will make you think “wtf is this guy smoking?
We are all plugged in and as much as we like to think that we use technology as a tool… sometimes it seems that we are the tools and technology is using us.
The last time you were freaking the hell out due to anxiety and you were in the presence of someone else who told you, “Breathe. Just breathe,” you probably felt like punching them in the face, right? That’s because you suck at breathing.
Mind reading: You assume that you know a person’s thoughts or internal motives, even though in reality you are just taking guesses.
Example: You text your significant other saying how much you love them and that you are really happy that things have been great lately. You ask them if they want to go to a movie later. I’m talking super cutesy with emojis and everything. Five minutes later, you get the response, “K.” That’s it, just… K. When you see your partner later you say, “So you don’t want to go to the movies?” You’re already pissed because you assume that they don’t care as much as you given their lackluster response.
If they cared as much, they would have used an equivalent number of emojis… duh. In reality, they were just driving on the freeway and cared enough about you to not get killed by texting while driving.
Steps To Help You in Letting Go of Anxiety
1. Retreat & Retract. Sometimes we can become obsessed with a thought that creates worry and anxiety. It can take up so much mental space, drain your energy and ultimately take you out of your present moment, stopping you from enjoying your day.
Since this is usually just mind-made thoughts creating negativity, it’s really important to retreat and retract. In other words take a moment to chill it out. Take yourself out of your office and go for a short walk, or grab a coffee and just retreat.
Then take a moment to stop, breathe and calm yourself down by reminding yourself that is your choice to feel this way and that this is not the best choice of feeling for the rest of the day.
2. Check your thoughts. Anxiety is a feeling being created simply and solely from your thoughts. Thoughts pop into our minds all the time and it’s good to be reminded that actually, we have a lot more control of the thoughts that we choose than we realise.
The only reason you are feeling this way is because you are thinking in a ‘catastrophic’ way in other words is negative! Slow down your thought process and work out what thoughts are serving you right now and what thoughts are not.
In other words if you are thinking ‘I cannot believe my email system is down and I now I cannot do ANYTHING, what will my clients think of me’ this will be creating a lot of negative feelings.
Instead start to question that thought, ask yourself is this thought serving me or making me feel bad? If it is the latter then question the hell out of it and start thinking about your situation in a more positive way for example ‘my emails will work again and right now I am doing my best within the current situation!’
3. Your thoughts are not facts. Us humans really do believe that what we think is always a fact. The truth is when we believe that every thought we have is true, we open ourselves up to a whole world of pain and stress.
If a thought comes into your mind that ‘you’re not good enough’ and you believe it, it can trigger a tonne of other negative thoughts and feelings around this.
However this is an un-managed mind. We have to learn to become mindful and recognise that our thoughts are not facts, and in turn we find a lot more peace. Allow these thoughts to float in and then out of your mind, and remember they are just thoughts.
4. Anxiety is a feeling and you are in control! Anxiety is simply a feeling created by a negative thought process. Ultimately we get to choose how we feel.
Choosing Anxiety is not ideal on any day so its time to start deciding how you do want to feel and then work your mind around how you are going to get there. Feelings are simply just a feeling.
They cannot hurt you unless you sit in the negative all day without wanting to change it. Choose a different feeling like ‘calm’ and then get your head right. How can I think about this in order to feel ‘calmer’? Then question yourself. Remember this is massive growth for you so go gently. But don’t sit there thinking ‘I cant do this’. You can. Now go question!
5. Have a chat with yourself. A great exercise to try now is to write down your anxious thoughts or worries in a notepad. Then imagine your friend is telling you this is how she feels.
How would you answer her back? What would you say to her from the point of view of being a caring, rational and loving friend. What For example, if your thought is ‘I am freaking out about going out on this date later, what if it is just awful’ you could respond to the thought with ‘This is only dinner with a boy! He could be a really interesting person and it might be a really enjoyable evening whether there is romance there or not. He might even be more scared than you!’. Following through on your thoughts make them less scary.
6. It’s only adrenaline! Many feelings we choose also result in physical symptoms. When we choose anxiety we are creating many uncomfortable physical symptoms like feeling jittery, palpitations, sweaty palm etc., you are literally creating your own
Your mind is powerful and you are letting it set off a roller coaster in your own body! Your body thinks it needs to fight, or flight (run away from danger) so it starts to produce a physical reaction.
Although adrenaline feels scary, it can’t really hurt you. So next time you experience those weird feeling symptoms, remember, it’s just adrenaline and you calm it down by calming down your mind.
7. Talk to someone. Anxiety can feel very isolating when you believe you’re alone in what you’re going through and that you are the only one in the world that feels like this.
The truth is that anxiety is actually very common. It is something that you do not have to live with and something that you can change. It’s really important to open up to friends and loved ones about your thoughts and feelings as talking about things can help you to feel better right away and get you seeing things with a clearer and more realistic, truthful perspective.
There is also so much information on the internet discussing anxiety so you can always take a moment to read a few blogs or articles on anxiety or even check out some online forums. Just remember this; anxiety is totally your choice. Choose a different thought and get a different feeling. Work on it and see how this changes for you. It’s guaranteed.
Best Place to Buy The Book
The best place I recommend you buy the book is on Amazon. The price there is fair and according to my research, it is the most trusted online store at the moment. It will also be very convenient for you to buy there if you were planning to do more online shopping today.
A good book with tons of humor and real life experiences which make this a very enjoyable read. Seems like author found a way to make a complex issue a simple one. Even simplifying the steps on facing your anxiety.
Feel free to leave in your comments as well
as your questions.
I hope you found this review useful to you.